


five minutes to midnight

by funkopop



Category: Persona 4
Genre: Idiots in Love, Love Confessions, Lowercase, M/M, Mutual Pining, New Year's Kiss, yes this is a new year's fic.
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-01
Updated: 2020-01-01
Packaged: 2021-02-27 06:22:41
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,947
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22062502
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/funkopop/pseuds/funkopop
Summary: it's just five minutes.but maybe that's all he needs.
Relationships: Hanamura Yosuke/Narukami Yu, Hanamura Yosuke/Persona 4 Protagonist, Hanamura Yosuke/Seta Souji
Comments: 5
Kudos: 83





	five minutes to midnight

**Author's Note:**

> it's been 84 years
> 
> also i didnt beta this im sorry for any mistakes love and trust x

surprisingly, yu had managed to visit for christmas this year.

he had explained, the year before, when he'd visited for summer, that his parents weren't very keen on him visiting too often. said that he "needed to focus on school" and because of that he wouldn't be able to visit during the winter break, and that they might even deny him golden week and possibly summer of the next year, too. yu had tried to be nonchalant about it, but yosuke had noticed the sound of longing and even a bit of indignation in his voice.

yu--or, rather, his parents--had stayed true to their word, and he hadn't been able to visit for golden week or summer of this year.

and then, surprisingly, he had managed to make it out here for christmas. almost completely out of the blue, too. yosuke had been at home, circling through the same three apps on his phone and trying to think of what he was going to do about college and all that, when his phone rings suddenly, and the voice on the other side is yu saying--as if it's no big deal--"come outside."

it wasn't completely unplanned, though, and thankfully, yu hadn't run away from home. dojima had known about it, apparently, and it had started out as a secret to keep from nanako, which eventually led to it somehow being a secret to be kept from yosuke, as well.

it was nice, having him here. though, his visit quickly became a flurry of different events as everyone tried their best to show him a good time for however long he was supposed to be here, since knowing his parents, it was very likely he wouldn't be here long.

often, yu was being pulled this way and that way by so many people that yosuke had to stop to wonder if he had any time to think, or even breathe. there was the investigation team, excitedly planning group events. there was rise--just rise, by herself--who was determined to find as much time with him alone as she could. and then there were a number of yu's friends from school--at least, those of which had stuck around--and finally there was dojima and nanako. 

...and of course, there was also the time yu found to devote himself to all the strays around the area, several of which had been busy creating more strays, possibly in anticipation for yu's return. at least, that's how yosuke thought of it.

there had been so much for yu to do, so many people for him to see and talk to and be with, that yosuke had barely got any time with him. there had been the welcome home gathering, a number of small outings in between, and the christmas party to see him off, but they'd all been in groups, and yosuke wanted to be alone with him.

and then, the day after christmas, the day everyone had expected him to be on the earliest train home, he had showed up to yosuke's house, completely unannounced and with nanako in tow, asking if he wanted to come with them to make snowmen. yosuke had asked, confused, if he didn't have a train to catch, and yu had said, completely calm as if this wasn't information he should've shared from the start, "what do you mean? i'm here until new year's."

so that was that. by some miracle, yosuke had been allowed extra time with yu, time enough he could catch him alone, so that they could talk and he could say everything he probably should've said before. _way,_ way before.

yet for some reason, yu had ended up swept in another whirlwind of events, and there was too much to do and too little time because there are only _so_ many days in december after christmas.

...and yosuke had run out of time again, leading to where they are now, the 31st of december, at 11:45pm, holed up in yu's room. yosuke is perched on the arm of his couch, one leg drawn close to his body as he rests his head atop his knee. and yu standing near the window, curtains drawn they both stare out his window in relative silence.

this had somehow ended up being the only _real_ time alone with yu yosuke managed to snag for himself. and honestly, it hadn't even been intentional. he had come over because they were supposed to go to a party yukiko was having at the inn, and yosuke was _supposed_ to walk him over there, as an escort, of sorts. but he'd shown up at the door, and yu had opened it, not even dressed for the event--instead decked out in an old grey sweatshirt and pink pajama pants with cats printed all over them. he'd given yosuke an amused look, and then he’d said, without a care in the world, "let's spend the evening together instead."

so now here they are.

their absence will definitely be noticeable, and yosuke can't help thinking about that over and over. it's going to stick out when the person the party's for isn't even there, missing along with the one who was _supposed_ to be his escort, and yukiko was going to get _so_ mad at him for not bringing yu over like he was supposed to. 

yu seems unbothered, though, like he had no plans to go from the start. that's probably true, now that yosuke thinks about it. when he'd shown up, yu had apparently been in the middle of an early new year's celebration with nanako before he got ready to cart her off to bed. the cat print pajama bottoms were probably another dead give away that he had no intention of leaving home.

picking up on yosuke's loud thinking, yu says, "you should stop worrying about it so much. it's fine."

yosuke--who had apparently been bouncing one of his legs with increasing speed as he worried about the party--jumps at the sudden break in silence. 

"no," he says first, but isn't sure where to go from there, so he shuts up for a minute. then, "no, it's not. they were having the party for you, you know. to send you off."

"hm." yu hums in response, tilting his head as though thinking deeply about something. "hmmm."

yosuke just glares at him, but it doesn't do much to deter yu, because yu isn't paying attention to him at all, and because the sharp glare soon melts into a whole other look that yosuke's glad yu isn't paying attention to him to see.

with the curtains drawn and the moonlight shining into yu's little room, everything is bathed in a soft white light, especially yu. and it is oh so hard to be mad at yu when everything about him looks so pretty in moonlight; the way the light makes his eyes shine, how his already grey hair now seems to be devoid of all colour, and the smile on his lips, barely noticeable, as he stands there contemplating yosuke's words. he looks otherworldly, ethereal. unreal, even. he looks like a dream yosuke doesn't want to wake up from.

...and _god_ , that was _so_ corny. it’s a damn good thing yu can’t read minds.

he's staring at yu with a look of pure adoration; a look he would rather be dead than have yu see on him before he can say what he has to. so when yu decides he's done thinking, and turns back to yosuke with an almost pleased look on his face, yosuke startles so bad it's honestly a miracle he hadn't fell off the arm of the chair.

"it's fine," he states once more, either oblivious to yosuke's almost-accident or deliberately ignoring it, "i'm sure yukiko will understand, and besides."

"besides?"

"i wanted some time alone with you." he looks yosuke directly in the eyes as he says it. there’s a hint of longing in his eyes, yosuke thinks. or hopes. but he's definitely giving him some kind of look--one that's specifically making him feel soft. "we haven't got to spend much time together since i've been here."

for some reason--he really can't explain why--yosuke finds himself going red. 

"you were busy, y'know? you had a lot to do and a lot of people to see." yosuke says, shrugging as he does, "i didn't wanna be the one to hog you. i mean. i'm not the only one who missed you."

yu tilts his head once more. "you could've said something." he says. he sounds sad, regretful. like the fact that he barely had time for himself was his fault, somehow. "i would've cleared my schedule in a heartbeat for you."

that's true, it is. if he'd tried, if he'd taken the initiative and just dragged yu off somewhere before someone else could've, he would've been able to have time alone with yu. rise was proof enough it could've worked, as she'd done everything she could've to grab a moment alone with him. and it had worked, most of the time.

"it always seemed like you were being dragged off somewhere by someone, even when you didn't want to be." yosuke points out, resting his head atop his knee again. "and then other times no one at all knew where you were, and i figured you were off somewhere taking a breather, so i didn't wanna bother you."

yu furrows his brows, seemingly annoyed. then he looks almost guilty, for some reason. as if somewhere in his mind he’s reprimanding himself for daring to take time alone.

"i'm sorry," he says, quietly, the playfulness from before dropping from his voice, "i should've tried making time for you sooner. for us."

yosuke's ears feel hot at the implications of _for us,_ but he decides to ignore it.

"it's fine, partner. it's not like you can help it, you know? everyone was being a bit much. you needed your space." he laughs awkwardly, trying not to look directly at him. "but maybe skipping out on yukiko's party wasn't the best way of doing that. what time is it? maybe we can still make it."

"it's 11:55." yu says in a complete monotone. "and i have a train to catch very early. there's no point in going anymore, so really, yosuke, don't worry about it."

11:55. there was only five minutes until the new year. he has only five minutes of time alone left with his partner, and only five minutes for him to say everything he needs to.

five minutes. it wasn't much, but if he plays his cards right, it'd be all he needed.

clearing his throat, yosuke asks, "what time is your train? maybe we can spend some time together before you leave?"

beside him, yu shakes his head, a bit of his hair falling into his face as he does--it's gotten longer since they've last seen him. yosuke remembers him saying something about wanting to grow it out.

"too early," he frowns, "they put me on the earliest possible train out of here. i leave as soon as the trains start running."

"oh. well," yosuke smiles, but the smile feels shaky and uncertain. he’s nervous that he’s going to be unable to do this. "at least we're together now, right? it's not much, but i'll take what i can get."

yu's frown deepens, "you could've gotten more." 

that makes yosuke go even redder, and just to avoid yu’s stare, he looks out the window instead. it’s snowing, and combined with the brightness of the moonlight, everything looks so white. serene. it’s probably the best kind of scenery to give a confession to.

“want to count down to the new year’s?” yu says, almost out of nowhere. “we can have our own little celebration. hopefully, i’ll be able to visit more, next year, and we can spend more time together.”

yosuke swallows the lump in his throat as he tries his best to not let his voice crack when he responds, “y-yeah, dude. what time is it?”

turning to look at a nearby clock, yu says, his voice soft, “11:57. three minutes to go.”

three minutes, right? he can do this. it’s nothing hard; it doesn’t have to be a full on speech, does it? he can just say it, right now before it hits 12. something simple like, “and hey, you know, i’ve always really liked you.”

“at what point do we start counting?” is what comes out of his mouth instead, and he wants to kick himself for not just going for it. there’s not much to lose, he reminds himself, yu is on a train back to tokyo tomorrow before yosuke’s even ready to start his own day. just say it, say it now, and there will be no consequences, because he won’t be here after today.

....which is, all on its own, a whole other story that yosuke doesn’t want to think about too much. does it even make a difference, confessing at all, when yu will be too far away from him for it to matter, whether or not his feelings are reciprocated?

yu turns to look at him, his grey eyes piercing, searching yosuke’s face. it’s as though he knows there’s something on yosuke’s mind that he won’t let himself say.

but yu is not always a talkative person. and often will not pry. yu waits, usually, until whoever it is is talking with him naturally lets whatever it is that’s bothering them off their chest, because that’s the kind of therapeutic aura he has about him. he sits, he listens, and eventually you’re comfortable enough to just say whatever it is you want to him, and he will somehow always know what to say back.

yosuke sighs. the moon outside is beautiful tonight. it’s a comment he wants to make outloud, just casually, but somewhere in his mind what little he can remember from his high school classes reminds him that, hey, that’s about the same as saying “i love you”, and yu is definitely the type who would pick up on that reference. 

he should say _something_ , though.

so he takes a deep breath, “i--.”

“11:58,” yu informs him, uncharacteristically interrupting yosuke before he’s even had a chance to finish whatever it is he’d been planning to say. “2 more minutes.”

when he says that, he turns from the window, holding the hem of the curtain loosely in his hand. he turns and looks directly at yosuke, walking towards him, the curtain in his hand being pulled as he does, letting more and more of the moonlight in. 

he inches closer to yosuke, who--almost forgetting that he’s sitting on the arm of a goddamn couch--tries to draw back, only to almost fall before quickly catching himself. yu doesn’t react with anything other than a small, amused smile, and then he lets the curtain go.

yu has to bend, just a bit, but he’s so close now that their faces are barely apart. and then he stares, right into yosuke’s eyes. yu stares--this is something that all their friends have known since first meeting him--that yu stares, a _lot_. but this time he’s staring at yosuke with a different kind of expression. maybe it’s the moonlight, maybe yosuke is seeing what he wants to see, but his eyes are twinkling--mischievous, like he’s planning something.

he says, voice barely above a whisper, face inches away from yosuke’s, “is there anything you’d like to say before the new year hits?”

yosuke glances over at the clock. 11:59. 

there’s only so much time he has left. yu even had the decency to ask, to prompt him to speak. and yet he still can’t get the words out his mouth.

swallowing thickly, and doing his best to look right back at yu without completely losing his nerve and bolting out of his room and straight to yukiko’s party--if it’s still even on--yosuke says, “maybe?”

10 seconds.

“well,” yu says. his hair is probably long enough to put up in a small ponytail, yosuke notices. it looks good on him. it frames his face in a way that makes yosuke’s ears go even redder as he fixates on it. “i do.”

9 seconds.

“yeah?” yosuke says, laughing nervously. he's trying his hardest to not completely lose his nerve, and yu is close enough that yosuke can smell whatever shampoo it is he uses. it’s some kind of citrus scented one. it’s...nice, yosuke finds himself thinking. comforting. it's making him lose his goddamn mind. “and what’s that?”

8 seconds.

for a minute yu straightens up, and turns his attention back out the window, at the moon and the stars and the piles of snow covering everything. he says, quietly, “how much i’m going to miss you. when i leave.”

7 seconds.

yosuke says, “i’ll always be here, you know, partner. phones are like, this cool new thing people made, that we can like, talk on those until we can see each other again.” 

yu laughs at that, a small, somewhat sad sounding chuckle. he takes one last look at the moon outside, and then turns his attention back to yosuke, bending back down, bringing their faces way too close again. 

“yeah,” he says, “i’ll call everyday.”

6 seconds.

yu is still too close. it hurts to think that, come tomorrow, it’ll be a long while before they can be this close to each other again. yosuke looks away from him for a second, out the window, at the moon. at the stars. at the shitty little town that he would’ve never met yu without.

and he turns back to yu, looking right back at him with all the confidence he can muster, taking in every little detail of his face so that after he leaves tomorrow, he can remember him, remember this night, remember every single feeling. even the embarrassing ones.

and then he says, trying his best not to let the corniness of just saying it get to him, “the moon looks real beautiful tonight.”

yu giggles, bumps their foreheads together lightly, so now their faces are closer than ever. yosuke’s entire face feels as though it may as well be on fire, and he needlessly starts worrying about whether or not yu even remembers that what he said is that dumb thing from literature class, or if he just thinks yosuke’s being an idiot. again.

5 seconds

yu says, a smile forming on his lips, “i like you too, yosuke.”

a hush falls over the room. yu’s face is still too close to yosuke’s, and yosuke’s heart is now performing an entire drum solo on its own in his chest. yosuke looks down, right at yu’s lips, and notices that he’s mouthing something. not actually saying the words, though, just mouthing them.

so yosuke, as embarrassing as it feels to do, keeps his eyes on yu’s lips as he does so, mouthing along, 

“four,

“three,

“two,

“one.”

and then yu’s lips are on his.

a new year's kiss. that wasn't in the plan at all, but, it's a nice surprise. and as self-conscious as he is about not being a good kisser, yosuke kisses back, because he's not sure when they'll ever be able to do this again.

yu tastes like peppermint candy, and yosuke decides to add it to the list of things to remember, for when he leaves tomorrow. the cat print pajama shorts. his hair falling neatly around the crook of his neck as he bends in closer. the smell of citrus shampoo. peppermint candy.

when they pull away, yosuke starts laughing, one that starts out too loud and has to eventually be hushed down to stifled giggles, since nanako is still asleep, and they don’t want to wake her up. he laughs so hard that in the end he ends up falling off the arm of the couch, backwards into the actual seat, and before he can even process it, yu is climbing in beside him in the too small couch, stifled laughter coming from him as well as he tries his best to fit beside yosuke, but still ends up mostly on top of him.

and when they stop laughing, yosuke says, “i guess i’m glad i missed the party.”

yu laughs, rests his head in the crook of yosuke’s neck, and says, “it’s fine.” then he yawns, whispers, “happy new year.” and then yosuke doesn't hear anything from him after that, because he's fallen asleep.

the next day yu is gone before any of his friends have a chance to see him off, leaving on the earliest train, just like he’d said would. yosuke wakes up in the dojima’s household to an empty room, in yu's shitty couch with a crick in his neck, probably hours after dojima and nanako had already dropped him off at the station. the only thing left behind is a note from yu, scrawled in a hurry, saying he's sorry about not being to spend more time with him, that he didn't want to wake him up before he had to leave, and how he’ll see him again, golden week, hopefully.

and beside it, a piece of peppermint candy.

yosuke takes the note, and the candy, shoves it into his jacket pocket. he quickly leaves yu’s room, not having much of a reason to be there without him, and after heading downstairs, offers an awkward good morning and goodbye to dojima before heading for home.

it’s cold outside. still snowing. still white. the whole world feels brand new, like a dream. all of last night had felt like a dream. the entire visit had felt like a dream. just yu, being here one day and not the next feels like a dream on its own. 

yosuke sighs, closes his hands around the note in his pocket. decides not to dwell on anything too negative, tries to remember everything he can about the night before instead. the citrus. the peppermint. how long yu’s hair had gotten, and whether or not he planned to grow it any longer. the goddamn cat print pajama pants.

he takes out his phone, quickly finds yu’s number, and texts, because he hadn’t gotten the chance to say it properly the night before, _hppy nw yr prntr._

he doesn’t get a reply immediately, but he hadn't expect one, anyway. yu is probably tired, and asleep on the train. so he just continues his walk home, trudging slowly through the snow, his hands clenched around the note in his pocket. 

he takes the peppermint candy out his pocket, unwraps it, and pops it into his mouth. it tastes like yu. he's not sure if anything peppermint _won't_ remind him yu anymore.

he confessed. finally. yu isn’t here right now, but he had confessed, and they had kissed, and he was coming back for golden week and then they’d see each other again , be with each other again, and then maybe yu would move back to inaba, or yosuke could somehow make it to tokyo, and maybe they could be roommates, or… or something.

because who knows what the new year will bring?

but he feels accomplished nonetheless. having finally said what he needed to. finally getting to say something he probably should’ve ages and ages ago. and _sure_ he had said it in the most corny way possible, and _yeah_ , yu had probably done most of the work for him.

but he had only five minutes.

and in the end, that was more than enough.

**Author's Note:**

> thanks for reading i've been sitting on this one since last year this exact time and it SHOWS. like you can TELL where i started and when i stopped and when i started again. srry about that teehee but i just wnted 2 get a souyo fic out. ive been sitting on too many of them for too long.
> 
> hmu @ sidep4 on tumblr dot edu if you wanna say "hey fuck you this fic was gay" or if you just wanna see me make fun of yosuke every other day


End file.
